Known to many as a fierce advocate for senior rights here in Gig Harbor, Betty Lilienthal was nominated by the Morning Rotary Club as the winner of the most recent Star Award. At 88 years old, she is still the most active fighter for senior health and senior activities within the community.
A year into retirement, Betty and her husband decided to move away from the city of San Francisco and pursue a quieter life in the Pacific Northwest. Even though neither of them had been in Gig Harbor before, 2003 was the year that they decided to buy a house and commit to this completely new community.
As an active citizen, Betty had always been involved in activities and gatherings, but after a few years in Gig Harbor, she realized that as a senior, she was lacking these opportunities for involvement. “Gig Harbor had very little, and I come from big cities, basically Chicago and San Francisco, so every neighborhood had little community centers and different things and everything from little kids to the older people,” she said. Volunteering was her only option, so she started teaching computer skills to seniors at the old Boys and Girls Club. Many seniors showed interest and attended regularly, although they were taught the same skills every time. Soon it became obvious that the main reason for the huge turnouts wasn’t the technological education, but rather the opportunity to be in good company and socialize. “That’s what seniors need—and so we started doing some good stuff. I was really pleased,” Betty continued. Then after 10 years of establishing this as a senior center with activities for the community, the building was sold to the school district, and the seniors were left in the dark with no place to meet up and organize events.
All of these activities being stripped away from the seniors did not sit right with Betty, so she went to the Peninsula Metropolitan Parks district, where she saw sports for kids and young adults. “But where the [heck] are seniors?” was Betty’s question. She quickly got in contact with the executive director, and soon enough there was a specific calendar for senior activities lined up. “We’re doing exercise, we’re doing art, we’re doing music, and we do trips. I mean, it’s just expanded,” Betty said. It took a lot of work and involvement from many people to see this made into reality. However, Betty is not finished. Her ultimate goal is to have a building that is dedicated solely to seniors. A place where they can feel at home—have their own hat racks and coffee mugs. Where they can simply come to hang out and socialize without needing a planned activity or reason to go. It would be an opportunity for senior friendships to flourish and develop through simple, social activities such as a knitting club, which Betty recalls as a favorite amongst the ladies at the previous senior club.
“They would knit and crochet and just talk about whatever. Sometimes I’d walk in there, and someone would be crying. They’d be sharing, or they’d be angry… you know, and it was one of the women who told me, “This, to me, is a safe place where I can talk with someone who understands me, speaks my language.” I mean, it’s great that we mix with the kids. I mean, it’s wonderful. Intergenerational socialization is great. But sometimes you just need an old person that’s been where you are, you know?”
Managing socializing was especially hard during COVID-19, as everyone was isolated and stuck at home all day long. Seniors’ mental health was a big worry for Betty, which is why she quickly gathered a crew and came up with a plan. For 18 months every Friday, there would be a food delivery system where people volunteered to drive to seniors’ homes and deliver free bagged lunches. Social distancing was still a barrier, but even just a short interaction from afar would brighten up a day. “I had people stand at their door and cry because I was the only human being they saw all week,” said Betty.
Betty is still improving the quality of life for the seniors in our community by continuously speaking up and talking to everyone she can. “I’ve talked with the county, talked with our newest senator, and I’ll just talk to anybody whether they want to listen or not.” Her relentlessness is like no other, driven by the vision of a community where seniors are active, social, and thriving.
“That’s my passion, and that’s what I’ve been doing all this time.”